[personal profile] rhya_of_stars
I'm finding I'm the first to not care about certain things. IE there's someone who Sarah is friens with that I really don'twant to talk to, and who seems a little off to me somehow. I'm a bit more sensitive to energy stuff than nearly any other fronter it looks like, and this person's is just... off somehow. Odd in a way I'm not sure I like too much.

Besides, I don't want to have to explain things to them. It's bad enough I'm going through emotions that I never thought I would need to. It's bad enough that I still feel like a burden to those around me, even though they say I'm not. Isn't it enough that I'm here? I don't want to have to explain that I'm someone familiar, yet someone so different too that it makes the similarities seem small in comparison.

I don't want to have to take chances of things from my past coming up and have to sit and pour out my life to a person who, while they say they want to read things, have a problem or two with the concept of soulbonding. Because you see, that's what our system is mainly comprised of: Soulbonds.

Maybe we were here all along, maybe we weren't, I'm not sure that's the point here. I'm pretty sure there were people here before she knew what the hell she was doing... Pretty sure, but not absolutely certain. Just... You know, being a newcomer, and inquisitive and stuff. There's just so much here.

Is it wrong of me to want to show her what this energy feels like and to tell her to start to break away from this person? I meahn, I know they're her friend, but I can feel them trying to drain us, and I... dear goddess... don't like. They give me stomach jitters. And they feel different from the ones we get from switching. I can't describe the difference, but it's there.

I feel like a horrible person for even thinking like this. But... I just... *shuddershiver*... something about this person puts me off a little. Just... does.

(And no it's no one here. I wouldn't be writing up this long rantyramble here if it were)

-Ria
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Date: 2009-07-01 11:42 pm (UTC)
the_coffee_shop: A mug of coffee with a leaf-like swirl in its center. (whit)
From: [personal profile] the_coffee_shop
Been there, done that... at least, I've been the person needing the advice on getting away from bad influences....

I know it's none of my business but I find myself wondering if it's anybody we know. :(

If the influence is really harmful then distance needs to be made, unfortunately.

-Whi

Date: 2009-07-01 11:43 pm (UTC)
the_coffee_shop: A mug of coffee with a leaf-like swirl in its center. (whit)
From: [personal profile] the_coffee_shop
Somehow I really screwed up signing my name. I think it's a slip up because I keep trying to get myself to sign it differently. Anyhow. :)

-Whit

Date: 2009-07-01 11:56 pm (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
It happens.

The body has acqaintances and patterns of behavior I staunchly disapprove of. I cannot change it because I'm only a priest, in our understanding it's the deity that works miracles, not His servants.

And sometimes severing these acquaintanceships is necessary. I really wish my granddaughter didn't hang around that old veteran like she does, but that cannot be helped. Ashari is the right (or wrong, perhaps) mixture of bullishness and stubbornness not to see anything wrong with that.

Ah, well...as the proverb goes if it's ideals you want Shuhar IV is not the place to find them. >.<

If you feel it should be severed, by all means discuss it with her.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:13 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
It's not someone I know, is it?

My daughter's the one I'm thinking of.

Though she's had to take enough shit that little shit is like water on a duck's back, a nuisance but no more.

I hope it's not Revcel. :(

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:19 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
Multiple? Is this my daughter you're referring to? She's a multiple system of three people, so....that would be...awkward.

I could write pages about the gap between reality and ideals, not least because in theory we are all supposed to have our rights respected. And the idea of making someone semi-sapient to get away with all kinds of abuse is awful, and that's what happened to Revcel, especially since I'm getting an inkling of why civilization scared and still scares her.

I don't know either. There are some in the Crew I do not like, like Jugashvili the unrepentant dictator and Non-Acceptance the fanatical maniacal would-be Cromwell.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:20 am (UTC)
the_coffee_shop: A mug of coffee with a leaf-like swirl in its center. (Default)
From: [personal profile] the_coffee_shop
Is it one of us? I have no idea if anyone here has said or done something they shouldn't... or given impressions they shouldn't, either. I surely hope it's not me, because if so, I obviously am completely clueless. :(

Whomever it is, I was in such a similar situation recently, and I just eventually had to call it off with the person who was causing the trouble... negative energy goes a long way, unfortunately.

-Whit

Date: 2009-07-02 12:22 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
Good. I was just a little nervous, and this makes me feel a bit better.

That's good.

In any case, my advice is still the same, discuss this with Sarah. Bad acquaintances are not very healthy for anyone.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:31 am (UTC)
the_coffee_shop: A mug of coffee with a leaf-like swirl in its center. (whit)
From: [personal profile] the_coffee_shop
Oh, hun listen, I worry about everything, so don't think it's your fault. I'm always worrying. Just how I am (and how Sylvyrr is too, for that matter).

I know how you feel. I always get nervous about negatively mentioning people, even when I know there's no way it could get back to them. It's tough to deal with situations like this, all the way around.

-Whit

Date: 2009-07-02 12:37 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
Ah. That sucks.

The Alliance is not a government we are fond of, we tend to look with disfavor on that kind of thing, and can do so from a better perspective now that we've manumitted the slaves and gotten around to legally ending the Tagashim Laws.

Ah. Then that's a sign to watch out for things. Male-bodied systems can be interesting, I've met another once (we are also a male-bodied system, with the interesting aspect that our "anima" is female, and has become my daughter, no less. O.o) in our Archives of our younger years. All the same I never really trusted the fellow....

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:40 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
Yes....I know. Before my daughter leaves, you could talk to her about it. She's got a similar Spider-sense as I call it. She saw something likely to end in disaster with one of our recently-deceased members before the rest of us did (member being Hyde).

And as I said, I do know. They tortured one of my metanormal daughters in an attempt to both enhance her abilities (useless, she already had an exponential-growth factor, they actually retarded instead of accelerating hers) and to break her to make her effectively a mind-controlled PMD. That's one thing I understand. Said daughter being the Lady Revcel whom you've met.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:43 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
It took my daughter years to stop seeing Huir around every corner after we de-programmed her from her brainwashing. As it was, she was right all along when the Freeborn like myself thought he was dead. That none of the Freedmen from his estate did in hindsight should have been a big flashing danger sign.

The Academy cannot find you, in the Inn you are safer than my daughter is in the Empire. You'd have a lot in common with my daughter in some ways.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:46 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
It's all right.

One of only two, eh?

It's funny that the body's previous locus of consciousness was also female, the only female of the First Four. When she left, my daughter found herself very unwillingly the new locus of consciousness.

Can't blame Jade for leaving, though. She endured a lot of abuse and maltreatment from the others of the First Four. Her bit when she started menstruating was really bad.

It happens. I still sometimes hate it when one of my upper eyes itches and I can't scratch it here because this is a two-eyed and not six-eyed body.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:54 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
My daughter concealed secrets we never knew till she died, including a mysterious photograph Revcel 2.0 won't identify. Says if her first body wouldn't mention the individual in it, the second one isn't about to stop doing what worked the first time.

Er....let's just say that when she starts describing some of Huir's favorite things to do, I found my dinner didn't stay down that day. And I used to be an Inquisitor who did shit like that for a living. And I hurled that day. So...yeah, Huir was a pretty fucked up little dirtbag. Think when Susan Roth said that she'd finally met someone much more evil than the Laughing Man that I was even more disturbed.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

Date: 2009-07-02 12:57 am (UTC)
halialkers: (Default)
From: [personal profile] halialkers
We sure didn't. I was confident Huir was dead. He wasn't going to get her and she was safe. Then he suddenly ended up back from the dead and that monster Rorschach killed another monster in Huir.

It takes some getting used to. Revcel has a fear of certain odors, one of which is a hospital-type smell. It took until recently for me to get the privileges that come with rulership to discover just what that pharmaceutical corporation had been doing in Northern Hataria, and why Revcel never has accepted any organic doctor except Masavlas the Elder. Adrian grimaced when the story came out....out of familiarity. One of those secrets she took to the grave.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.
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