firstentry observations

[rhya_of_stars]

I'm finding I'm the first to not care about certain things. IE there's someone who Sarah is friens with that I really don'twant to talk to, and who seems a little off to me somehow. I'm a bit more sensitive to energy stuff than nearly any other fronter it looks like, and this person's is just... off somehow. Odd in a way I'm not sure I like too much.

Besides, I don't want to have to explain things to them. It's bad enough I'm going through emotions that I never thought I would need to. It's bad enough that I still feel like a burden to those around me, even though they say I'm not. Isn't it enough that I'm here? I don't want to have to explain that I'm someone familiar, yet someone so different too that it makes the similarities seem small in comparison.

I don't want to have to take chances of things from my past coming up and have to sit and pour out my life to a person who, while they say they want to read things, have a problem or two with the concept of soulbonding. Because you see, that's what our system is mainly comprised of: Soulbonds.

Maybe we were here all along, maybe we weren't, I'm not sure that's the point here. I'm pretty sure there were people here before she knew what the hell she was doing... Pretty sure, but not absolutely certain. Just... You know, being a newcomer, and inquisitive and stuff. There's just so much here.

Is it wrong of me to want to show her what this energy feels like and to tell her to start to break away from this person? I meahn, I know they're her friend, but I can feel them trying to drain us, and I... dear goddess... don't like. They give me stomach jitters. And they feel different from the ones we get from switching. I can't describe the difference, but it's there.

I feel like a horrible person for even thinking like this. But... I just... *shuddershiver*... something about this person puts me off a little. Just... does.

(And no it's no one here. I wouldn't be writing up this long rantyramble here if it were)

-Ria

Comments

[halialkers]

We sure didn't. I was confident Huir was dead. He wasn't going to get her and she was safe. Then he suddenly ended up back from the dead and that monster Rorschach killed another monster in Huir.

It takes some getting used to. Revcel has a fear of certain odors, one of which is a hospital-type smell. It took until recently for me to get the privileges that come with rulership to discover just what that pharmaceutical corporation had been doing in Northern Hataria, and why Revcel never has accepted any organic doctor except Masavlas the Elder. Adrian grimaced when the story came out....out of familiarity. One of those secrets she took to the grave.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

[rhya_of_stars]

From what Revcel's told me, I'm not sorry he's dead. At all.

I'll say it does. I just hope people are as patient with me as you say tey will be. I'm going to be like this for a while... I don't know how long...

*sigh*


-Ria

[halialkers]

Neither am I. At one time, Revcel had the possibility to really choose her own path and she had more open to her. Then he had her for 19 years as his own personal property (along with 999,999 other victims) and did with her as he saw fit. And he wanted his own personal nuke, more or less, so he could declare his estate a sovereign country. That was his goal. And his sons and daughter were the Uday and Qusay to his Saddam.

However long you need. Sarasvasti, for instance, is really devastated with what's happening to her. This set back her progress in recovery quite a ways, and it isn't quite over yet. >.>

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

[rhya_of_stars]

o.o.... *shudder*

I hope it gets over soon. Loxari's really just not right at the moment. He sleeps because he has to. But he's not eaten in at least a day or so. I dunno if that's normal for him or not, but... Ayupe.

-Ria

[halialkers]

Friday morning, the issue will be resolved with bloodshed. Regardless of what the judge rules, and I know this man, he told me this morning that he'd been seeking a test case and that Sarasvasti was a perfect one because she was so vulnerable and fragile. Like Revcel's an object, so Sarasvasti is now. No wonder Heshatani is furious with how they've treated his daughter.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

[rhya_of_stars]

We.. fuck. We won't be here. :(

I was hoping we would be.

-Ria

[halialkers]

We'll have the post waiting for you.

Suffice to say that I don't give a damn what the Law says in this instance, their bacon's already fried. It was strange to hear one of the Aram brothers stand up and say that "House Chaliel considers principle important, and they are correct. Yet sometimes things must yield to reality." It's rare an Aram brother isn't completely off the wall. To allow this would be a dangerous precedent.

I just realized that Agati has again been absent. It appears the lawyer made a sneaky move and bumped the case up, planning to catch Agati off-guard. Agati's a trained lawyer, he knows how to resolve such dirty tricks. In five minutes, we'll know the verdict. Damn Bizjarranized felines, more trouble than they're worth. >.>

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

[rhya_of_stars]

It didn't work. Heshatani was expecting something like this, I bet.

Or I... I would think from what the memmories over here say.

-Ria

[halialkers]

Post was just written.

Suffice to say that they screwed up even worse, they picked a lawyer Heshatani's beaten in every case but one when he'd committed a capital crime and when the entire family was conned by that fucker.

Sarasvasti is safe. She's trembling right now. And she's crying again. I think these are tears because she realized how close she could have come.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

[rhya_of_stars]

I saw, commented.

The owlwinged guy was playing, but now he's not. I don't know where he flashed off to... but he just kinda vanished.

Or something. I dunno. He's presence is still visible, but I don't ... think he's *here* anymore, if you know what I mean.

[halialkers]

I do.

And this has managed to work for the good in the end.

And Sarasvasti still retains a trust of Loxari, and was asking to see him.

And yes, I do know what you mean.

H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.

[rhya_of_stars]

See previous post. I think he want's hunt time first... then he'll head over.

-Ria