firstentry observations
Jul. 1st, 2009 07:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rhya_of_starsI'm finding I'm the first to not care about certain things. IE there's someone who Sarah is friens with that I really don'twant to talk to, and who seems a little off to me somehow. I'm a bit more sensitive to energy stuff than nearly any other fronter it looks like, and this person's is just... off somehow. Odd in a way I'm not sure I like too much.
Besides, I don't want to have to explain things to them. It's bad enough I'm going through emotions that I never thought I would need to. It's bad enough that I still feel like a burden to those around me, even though they say I'm not. Isn't it enough that I'm here? I don't want to have to explain that I'm someone familiar, yet someone so different too that it makes the similarities seem small in comparison.
I don't want to have to take chances of things from my past coming up and have to sit and pour out my life to a person who, while they say they want to read things, have a problem or two with the concept of soulbonding. Because you see, that's what our system is mainly comprised of: Soulbonds.
Maybe we were here all along, maybe we weren't, I'm not sure that's the point here. I'm pretty sure there were people here before she knew what the hell she was doing... Pretty sure, but not absolutely certain. Just... You know, being a newcomer, and inquisitive and stuff. There's just so much here.
Is it wrong of me to want to show her what this energy feels like and to tell her to start to break away from this person? I meahn, I know they're her friend, but I can feel them trying to drain us, and I... dear goddess... don't like. They give me stomach jitters. And they feel different from the ones we get from switching. I can't describe the difference, but it's there.
I feel like a horrible person for even thinking like this. But... I just... *shuddershiver*... something about this person puts me off a little. Just... does.
(And no it's no one here. I wouldn't be writing up this long rantyramble here if it were)
-Ria
Besides, I don't want to have to explain things to them. It's bad enough I'm going through emotions that I never thought I would need to. It's bad enough that I still feel like a burden to those around me, even though they say I'm not. Isn't it enough that I'm here? I don't want to have to explain that I'm someone familiar, yet someone so different too that it makes the similarities seem small in comparison.
I don't want to have to take chances of things from my past coming up and have to sit and pour out my life to a person who, while they say they want to read things, have a problem or two with the concept of soulbonding. Because you see, that's what our system is mainly comprised of: Soulbonds.
Maybe we were here all along, maybe we weren't, I'm not sure that's the point here. I'm pretty sure there were people here before she knew what the hell she was doing... Pretty sure, but not absolutely certain. Just... You know, being a newcomer, and inquisitive and stuff. There's just so much here.
Is it wrong of me to want to show her what this energy feels like and to tell her to start to break away from this person? I meahn, I know they're her friend, but I can feel them trying to drain us, and I... dear goddess... don't like. They give me stomach jitters. And they feel different from the ones we get from switching. I can't describe the difference, but it's there.
I feel like a horrible person for even thinking like this. But... I just... *shuddershiver*... something about this person puts me off a little. Just... does.
(And no it's no one here. I wouldn't be writing up this long rantyramble here if it were)
-Ria
no subject
Date: 2009-07-02 01:40 am (UTC)Or I... I would think from what the memmories over here say.
-Ria
no subject
Date: 2009-07-02 01:43 am (UTC)Suffice to say that they screwed up even worse, they picked a lawyer Heshatani's beaten in every case but one when he'd committed a capital crime and when the entire family was conned by that fucker.
Sarasvasti is safe. She's trembling right now. And she's crying again. I think these are tears because she realized how close she could have come.
H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.
no subject
Date: 2009-07-02 01:57 am (UTC)The owlwinged guy was playing, but now he's not. I don't know where he flashed off to... but he just kinda vanished.
Or something. I dunno. He's presence is still visible, but I don't ... think he's *here* anymore, if you know what I mean.
no subject
Date: 2009-07-02 01:59 am (UTC)And this has managed to work for the good in the end.
And Sarasvasti still retains a trust of Loxari, and was asking to see him.
And yes, I do know what you mean.
H'vorxixnon H'ven Soroundon.
no subject
Date: 2009-07-02 02:15 am (UTC)-Ria